27.11.07

crickets

damn noisy lor.
and i think i need the loo.
to poop.
hahhaa
.
don’t mind me, i just need to express my feeeeeelings =)
hope this weekend will be a good one.

and darlings, i can drive now ;)

will love you later!

4 in the morning

yes that was the time that my body decide to wake up
given that i slept at 9 the night before, it was natural to be up and about after enough rest, no?
he says it’s cause i’m bleeding nervous about the driving exam

maybe i was =/
so to calm my jitters, i decide to go shopping online and talk to some lovely people =)

let’s just fast-forward to the juicy part shall we?
i am way too lazy to elaborate on how the examiner was being such a spoilsport and how most of us stifled laughs when we saw how a number of people fail the slope test and try in vain to make a quick getaway only to result in revving the engines so hard that we were all shit scared it would blow up in our faces +_+

but yes, there’s the juicy part where i end my exam and bounce joyfully into the waiting area for my driving instructor to come along and lo and behold, i set my eyes on this month’s hottest guy, like omgholyshietwtfamidoing! i swear, i never thought i’d see someone even close to your Average Joe on the perimeters of the driving grounds, but boy he sure did some good to my sore eyes ;)

i try to be as cool and calm as i can be, but he was like 2 metres away from me! i’ll be damned if i don’t steal another glance at him! i was like, God don’t do this to me laaaa pleasee!!
seriously, it was a super temptation!

you know, like you, i wish that day had ended with me hooking up with him
but no, he left a minute after all the drama had ended in my head
so yes i went home and slept/read my day away.

still, he gives me hope.
such fine human specimen survives the world’s tragedies.

didn’t i tell you i’ll love you later? ;)

25.11.07

solitude, you're by your lonesome

i might not be the first to admit this
but i’m afraid of being alone
i used to be the one that can’t even go to the loo without someone
not because i was afraid of toilet monsters, mind you
i was just used to the company of someone.
and in this way, i am spoiled.

this is about where i’m supposed to say i”ve changed anew
and to a certain extent, i can say “aye! i am new!”
having to do things on my own now
isn’t half as difficult as i thought it would have to be
taking the train alone, squashed in with strangers who are also alone
(or so they think, for i am one of you, am i not?)
eating your over-priced lunch at some obscure corner, with people not even throwing you a glance
it’s all one can do to pretend not to care
but you do
the thought of having spent my past few months in a manner that does not befit my personality
it is almost as if i am buried within, and on my surface, an introvert has taken over.
talk about split personalities
i resurface sometimes
with certain people around
familarity does the job.
but mostly i stay hidden, not one of the shining stars you see.
and i keep breathing.
so i am still alive.

24.11.07

new place

yes i think i made like a ton of new blogs
none of which i actually stuck with
i wanted to just have a private space to speak, ramble, rant and just maybe disappear into
doesn’t work with me, i see

i doubt there should be an intro to mellyboo
in fact, i think en li gave me this nick
for kicks
but yeah, i think this is the one thing that just might stick with me =)

on another note, it’s the end of the year
and really i think there’s just so much to look forward to!
=) =)
there’s the people who are coming back
there’s the job that i’ll wave adieu to
there’s Christmas celebrations that i’m up for
there’s a New Year, and i’m taking that to a whole new level =)
there’s a new college
there’s new people to meet, new things to learn

can’t you tell that i just can’t wait for that whole new life to kickstart?

not blogging has left quite a lot of time on my hands
which i don’t exactly use to do anything particularly useful =/
oh and btw, i noticed not many people use wordpress?
is blogger that MUCH better?
i’ll find out and let you know!
=)

listening to : holly brook - heavy

1.11.07

peeks

new blog
new life?
i don’t know if this would last
perhaps i’ve moved on to greener pastures
along with new people
and new interests

moxiemelle
mixandmatch
it’s just an experiment
if i can have the nerve to do what i have set out to do.

i’d like to keep this going for as long as possible
just to be free with my thoughts and opinions
really, it’s a lot tougher to be honest beings now.
=/

2 months to the end of 2007
i’m glad for the coming of the end.

and my heart comes a-tumbling down

i wonder how’d it sound like if your heart broke as if it were made of glass

i haven’t had the guts to listen to “light years away” by mozella
mainly because 8 months ago i’d crumble the moment the first chords strike my ears
i tried giving it a shot now and then
but i’d be clamming up on the inside, like a little girl afraid to open her eyes in the dark because of the monsters who live under her bed.

you probably don’t even understand what i’m even talking about.
i absolutely adore this song, don’t get me wrong.
in fact my ex-boyfriend had introduced it to me
and i fell head over heels for him and the song instantly.
boy, little did i know how much it would cost me
one song, one singer.

i recall asking a friend recently
“how is it possible that she can write such heart-wrenching lyrics?”
this is in reference to mozella and all other break up songwriters.
to imagine what it would be like to be in their shoes
what else could they use as inspiration for their melancholic songs
but experience in a field called “love”

i’m no expert
in fact, one true experience has left me, shall we say, jaded?
yes i’m in no place to be jaded with the best feeling in the world
but won’t you agree if i said it’s also one of the worst things to feel, especially if you can’t do anything about it?

i’m naturally an emo person, so don’t mind me.
to be frank, i’m quite touchy still about the past
and although talking about it helps to air pent-up feelings
i am inclined to just stick to blogging about it

i think it hurts much more when it’s spoken